Multiple Mudbloods
by Flavinette
Summary: Ever wondered what would happen if several different Hermiones were running loose around Hogwarts? Chaos, mayhem, laughs and mischief ensues.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

"No... What are you doing? ...What? ...NO!" Harry screamed, thrashing across his bed and falling heavily to the floor. Harry sat up panting, trying to untangle himself in the sheets. Somehow he had managed to get one corner tied around his foot. He grabbed his glasses off the nightstand, jamming them roughly on his face. After working on the knot for several minutes it came undone. Harry rubbed his foot and sat up.

_Sixteen and I still can't sleep through the night, _Harry thought wryly. He kept having nightmares about Sirius. It was less than a year ago from when he had stupidly led his friends to the Ministry of Magic. No one blamed him for Sirius' death, but Harry couldn't help grieving and feeling guilty. He fumbled for his wand and potions book.

Padding down the stairs he entered the deserted common room. He sat close to the dying fire and opened what had become his pastime. The Half-Blood Prince's textbook was useful for nights like these. He could practice whichever spells he pleased without Hermione sniffing at him. Harry ran his thumb lightly over the cracked and peeling spine of the book. Flipping the cover open at the back, he traced the crooked signature with a mixture of wonder and fear. Some part of him wanted to know who the person was that had aided him so many times in Potions. There was a niggling fear at the back of his mind that whispered his doubts back and forth, swirling among his thoughts.

Harry turned the pages swiftly and came across the last page that was dog-eared. Turning the page he peered into the margins and found several spells, charms and incantations. He tried out a hair flattening charm, but to no avail. His hair simply repelled the magic. Sighing with frustration he flicked his wand haphazardly and murmured the spell which was cramped in corner of the page showing how to brew the Draught of Living Death. "_Mensalio Firmuscindo!" _Nothing happened.

Harry yawned and closed the book with a sigh. Trudging up the stairs to his dormitory like a drunken man, he collapsed on his bed. Harry fell asleep instantly, glasses on, wand and book in hand. Turning over in his sleep, the book fell with a muffled thump, under the four poster bed. Harry slumbered on, unaware that his experimental magic had worked, unaware that the cloud of magic fumes were shifting and changing.

Back in the common room, the gas had changed from clear to a neon blue, and then to a dull purple. It swirled around in the faint stirrings of air and floated up the stairwell. It continued it's upwards rise when a breeze swept the magic under a door. The colourful fog was an iridescent green now and was moving slowly towards a window, where it could disperse into the wind harmlessly. A meter from the outside world a faint swirl made it veer to the left and over a snoring girl. Rolling over in her sleep, the girl sighed deeply and breathed in; wrinkling her nose slightly as the fumes tickled her face.

-o-

"Where the hell is Hermione?" raged Ron. Harry and Ron had been waiting for nearly a quarter of an hour for her. They were supposed to go down to Hagrid's hut and Hermione had never been this late before. Harry yawned distractedly and slumped in one of the cushy armchairs. He rubbed his temples while Ron's voice rang in his ears. Finally Harry stood up and pushed Ron into a chair. Ron sputtered, turning redder by the second. Catching a second year by the arm, he asked her quietly if she could get Hermione. The little girl turned beet-red and nodded quickly. She scampered up the stairs, much to Harry's satisfaction.

Ron grumbled and looked up at Harry. "What?" Harry said, standoffishly. "Your fuming wasn't helping much." Ron stood up quickly, his fuse already lit.

"I'm sorry, _Oh Great Chosen One_," Ron spat back. Harry was about to retaliate when he noticed Ron's face go slack. Turning around, Harry nearly fainted. Several Hermiones had come down the stairs and walked out the door, all different. One Hermione made a beeline to the dumbstruck pair. This Hermione had her bushy hair pulled back into a severe bun, much like Professor McGonagall's. Perched on her nose was a tiny pair of glasses and she had the eyes much like a raven's, cool, logical, intellectual. She fixed her beady eyes on the two boys and pursed her lips.

"I can see what a great help you two idiots will be," Hermione said sarcastically. "I'm afraid we've got a problem. It seems something has happened to me...us... I haven't been able identify what enchantment was used, but I think I know what has happened. It appears that something has caused me...Hermione...to change."

"_Really?_" interjected Ron sarcastically. "I _never_ would have guessed, I'm just so glad that-" Ron said, before Hermione cut him off, smacking him hard over the head with one of the many heavy volumes in her book bag.

"Violence is illogical, but time is of the essence. Please don't interrupt me again or I will use a heavier one." Hermione threatened, pushing the textbook back into her already bursting book bag. "Now, it appears that every copy of Hermione has retained a certain aspect of her. I, for example am her-"

"Bitchy side?" whispered Ron to Harry. A loud thwack accompanied his remark. Hermione had swung her book bag and clonked him over the head. Ron fell backwards onto a chair and looked up dazedly. "_WHAT NOW?_" he yelled at her.

"Just shut up and listen," Hermione said primly. "Now, I am her intellectual part. I come out during classes, when a problem arises and so on and so forth. The Hermione that you two knew is gone. Until this is reversed, we are just parts of her. Some of us may be unwilling to go back, as Hermione doesn't utilize them often. The longer they are left to themselves, the stronger they grow. We need to find all of them, fast, and find a way to reverse it before they leave the grounds or do something worse."

"Hermione is good though," Harry said slowly, "she wouldn't try to blow up the school or anything...Would she?"

"I would predict that it isn't too far out of the realm of possibility. No one is perfect and purely good, even Hermione has negative thoughts."

Ron groaned, and massaged his head. "How many are there?" he asked quietly.

"Honestly, I'm not sure. Last I counted there were roughly seven. They were all moving and milling about. Also a few left early." Hermione mused.

"Hermione, I think we should split up and find them. If there are that many out there, going as a group won't be as time efficient." Harry said. While he spoke he sent Neville, Luna and Ginny a message using the DA galleons, feeling the coin grow hot in his palm.

"Harry, you need to understand this. I am _not_ Hermione, I am _part_ of Hermione. Calling us all Hermione will just confuse us. We should call the copies after what they are, rather than what they were. I am Smarts. As for the rest of your plan, I will remain here. Once you find a part of Hermione, bring it here. I need to run some tests and attempt a solution; I will also be able to restrain them easier in one place than on the run after another part of me."

Ron stood up, wand out. "Let's go, we're just wasting time." Ron tried to walk by but Smarts put up a hand.

"Give me your arm," she said. At Ron's quizzical look, she conjured a watch and fastened it around his wrist. The face of the watch was just a mirror however. "Tap it with your wand and say someone's name, that person's watch will show yours and you will be able to communicate throughout Hogwarts and the ground with it. And yes Harry, I did get the idea off your father's mirror."

Harry smiled at the thought of James and accepted the proffered watch from Smarts. He also took a few extra for the DA members that were going to help, passing a few to Ron. Before leaving he slipped one around Smarts' wrist, smiling. Smarts nodded briskly at set about clearing the room of furniture and conjuring curious looking equipment.

"Ready mate?" asked Ron nervously. Harry nodded and laughed.

"I'm looking forward to seeing you and Angry-Hermione talking," Harry said, as Ron paled.

**A/N: Hi Everyone! This story's been clawing at my mind for awhile now. Now stop bugging me muse! I've started a blog were you can follow my writing progress and ask questions; the link is on my profile. **

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	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

"So let me get this straight," Ginny said, turning from Ron to Harry and back again. "Hermione's been split into different parts and now are loose in the school?"

"Thanks for the recap Gin," Ron said impatiently. "Can we go now?" Ginny raised her eyebrows, tightening the grip on her wand. Ron watched her warily.

"Are you two done yet?" Luna interjected quietly. "Family shouldn't fight, friends shouldn't either. Right now we should be working together. If we keep bickering the wrackspurts will come and I really don't want to deal with them again." Neville placed a hand on her shoulder, smiling.

"Thanks Luna. Let's split up, we can cover more of the school that way." Harry said drawing out the Marauders' Map. As he tapped it, they all scanned the parchment, looking for Hermione. One dot labelled Hermione was pacing rapidly around the Gryffindor common room.

"There's one," Ron said pointing towards the Slytherin common room. "What's she doing in there? Who's she with?"

"It looks like Blaise Zabini and Draco Malfoy are with her." Ginny said, looking up at Ron. "Hermione can handle them Ron, they won't hurt her."

"Hermione as a whole can handle them, just part of her... I don't know." Harry said, not lifting his eyes from the map. Ron jumped up, running down the corridor, drawing his wand as he ran.

"You're going the wrong way Ron." Ginny called. Ron turned on his heel, running back down the hall past them. The tips of his ears were pink with embarrassment. They continued scanning the map and before long a few other Hermiones were spotted. Luna and Neville ran down to the Great Hall towards two Hermione dots. Ginny had run towards the grounds outside while Harry had gone down to the kitchens.

-o-

Ron had finally made his way to the Slytherin common room before realizing that he didn't know the password. He cursed quietly, tapping his watch.

"What's going on Ron? Have you got her yet?" Harry asked.

"Not yet. I don't know the password; you don't know it, do you?"

"No, but it's got to be about pureblood supremacy or something like that-" Ron cut him off with a shushing motion. The skull covered wall had slid back at that moment as Draco booked it past the stunned redhead, not even pausing to notice Ron. He ran out of sight as Ron slid into the darkened room.

There were candles floating in midair and a warm fire glowed in the hearth. A dark shape slinked her way over to Ron. She placed at soft hand on his wrist tugging the watch from the stunned boy's arm and throwing it into the corner of the room.

"Would you like to have a seat?"

Ron nodded mutely.

-o-

"Ron? Ron!" The mirror had turn blank, reflecting Harry's face, instead of the darkened room before. He pulled out the map again, scanning for Ron's dot.

Ron was next to Blaise Zabini's dot with Hermione circling around them. Draco Malfoy was nowhere to be seen. Harry paused, debating. He would just have to go to the kitchen quicker, and then go as fast as he could to the Slytherin's common room. Ron and Hermione should be able to hold off Blaise for a few more minutes.

Harry ducked through a tapestry and emerged in front of the fruit bowl painting. He tickled the pear and gasped at the sight that met his eyes. There was a camouflage clad Hermione with war paint streaked liberally on her cheeks, standing on a stove top and screaming at the top of her lungs.

"For as long as you have existed, your purpose has been to serve, to be told and directed, but no more," she yelled at the sea of elves in front of her. "From this day onwards you shall your own Masters! We shall cast off the shackles of wizarding oppression and have an equal say in how this world is run. No longer shall you have to worry about picking up clothes or whether there is dust on the floor. You shall be free to choose your own destiny!" The elves were bobbing up and down, tiny fists raised and screaming along with her. Harry closed the door behind him and as one, the elves all turned to look at him.

"Wizard! Get him!" Harry felt himself lifted off the floor and carried to the stove. Oddly he thought of muggle rocks stars being carried in the crowd after stage jumping. After a few seconds he was deposited at Hermione's feet.

"What do you want?" She said, "What could a wizard want to do in the kitchens? The kitchens were you all have dwelled for years without thanks or praise!" She turned back to Harry, glaring at him, eyes wide with rebellion.

_Hermione has a rebellious side?_ Harry thought to himself. _I shouldn't be surprised. She did try to get Sirius to set Kreacher free and she started SPEW. _Hermione kicked him in the shin.

"Ow! What was that for? Bloody hell..." Harry rubbed his leg. "Now I'm going to have a bruise."

"You have two second to tell me why you are here before I give you another one."

"Okay! Just stop kicking me." Harry paused, brain whirring. "I-I came because-" The gears clicked into place. "I came because I heard of one who is trying to stop you. I am...sympathetic to your cause and thought that you should know. I believe in elf rights too and heard Smarts talking about how it would be in her best interest to squash this movement. She is alone right now in the Gryffindor common room plotting her... uh, plot?" Harry finished rather weakly but Rebellion did not seem to notice.

"Tinkles! What do you think?" Tinkles jumped up in the stove, although with some difficulty. He was a large, fat elf with a protuberant nose and beady eyes.

"I believe," Tinkles said, licking his lips. "We should move now to eliminate this, so called _Smarts_."

"Very well, I shall go with our newest recruit and confront this threat. Do not strike until I return, we will need to coordinate our attack." Harry let out the tiniest sigh of relief. Rebellion grabbed Harry's hand and jumped down, wading through the elves until they reached the door. She pushed Harry through then turned back to the crowd.

"I shall return quickly and our victory shall be sweet!" This was met with a chorus of cheers. Closing the door, she ran past Harry, who was still a little dazed. He ran just a little behind her, whispering to his wristwatch.

"Smarts, Rebellion is heading your way. Watch out she's feisty."

"Don't worry, I'm ready."

"Come on informant! We need to hurry, time is of the essence. Who were you talking to?" Rebellion called back to him, shoving some first years out of their way as they passed.

"I was just muttering apologies to the students you nearly ran over," Harry replied, more to himself, but Rebellion didn't seem to notice as they had just reached the portrait hole.

"Password?" The Fat Lady asked.

"I don't know. Let me in you largely overweight woman! I am on a mission of most importance and puny authoritative figures such as yourself will not stand in my way." The painting crossed her arms in response, pursing her lips. Harry leaned forwards and whispered to the Fat Lady.

"I'm sorry about her. Hermione isn't really herself today, and-" Harry looked briefly at Hermione, "she's just really jealous of your beauty." The painting blushed and straightened.

"Password?"

"Err, Quid Agis?" Harry said before Rebellion could respond. She pushed past Harry through the open portrait hole at a brisk pace. Before Harry could step through after her, a book bag swung through the air, colliding with the back of Rebellion's head. She collapsed on the ground; knocked unconscious as Smarts stepped out, setting down the bag of books.

"Was that really necessary?" Harry asked. "Couldn't you just have stunned her?"

"I would have if I had still had my wand. Someone stole it when I went upstairs to get the rest of my books." Harry looked around at the common room. It seemed to have been turned into a makeshift library. Harry sighed and conjured a couple of chairs and propped Rebellion up in one, tying her hands behind her back with a length of rope he had conjured.

"Has anyone else come back?"

"Does it look like it?" Smarts replied, rather waspishly. Harry was getting thoroughly irritated now.

"Who knows? There could be a pile of bodies behind all these books and I wouldn't know it!" A small squeak emanated from behind a table and a scared looking first year looked out. It dawned on Harry just then what it must look like. A severe looking Hermione was knocking people unconscious with books, another Hermione was tied to the chair, and looked like she had been on a military mission. To make matters worse she was stirring.

"What's going on? Why I am tied up? Release me now! I have an army to command, they need me." She caught sight of Harry just then. "You! You liar, infiltrator! You said you wanted elf rights just like me! Filth!" Rebellion was screeching, thrashing madly and only succeeded in knocking herself over. Harry bent down to prop her up but she kicked him hard, right where no guy wanted to be hit. He doubled over in pain. When the pain receded somewhat, he quickly tied her legs to the chair also, then propped her back up. The little boy just then made a mad dash for the door. Smarts swung the bag again, knocking the boy to the ground, unconscious.

"Why did you do that?" Harry roared.

"What? I can't have word getting out that we're rounding up other Hermiones. The others will hear and flee the grounds then."

"Couldn't you have just explained it to him?" Harry gestured at the little first year.

"He wouldn't hold his tongue. I doubt anyone could." Before Harry could react she set about deftly tying him up and set him on a nearby sofa. She turned to look at him. "Don't you have other Hermiones to catch? You're just wasting time gaping there with your mouth open. You look like a stunned troll." As Harry tried to compose a retort she shoved him out the portrait hole. "Don't come back unless you've got another Hermione with you."

-o-

Draco emerged in the candlelit common room, gasping for breath. He staggered over to the couch where a woman was circling around Ron and Blaise. Her hands were playing idly in their hair and she whispered words into their ears, making them sigh. She looked up, her large, dark eyes sparkling.

"You _did_ find my wand. I think you definitely earned a reward for that." She circled around the couch to Draco, plucking the wand from his hands, and then turning back to Ron and Blaise. "I'll be back soon, so don't go too far." They nodded mutely in response. She turned back to Draco, snaking an ivory arm around his waist, and moving closer so there was no space between them. "You have five minutes alone with me, and then I need to get back to business. I think the dormitories will be much more private than here, don't you think?" Draco nodded, and let her lead him up the stair well.

-o-

Harry pounded down the stairs towards the dungeons and hammered hard on the skull wall.

"Ron! Open up! It's Harry, are you and Hermione okay?" The door opened as a glassy eyed Ron got the door. Harry pushed past him and saw Blaise looking glassy eyed as well. Harry felt his stomach sink. "What's happened? Where's Hermione? Are you lot okay?" Ron just sat back down on the sofa. Harry crossed over to him, shaking Ron roughly. "Where is she?"

"Upstairs-" Ron gulped, "with Draco." Harry made for the stairs, but Ron grabbed his sleeve. "Harry, have seat. If we're good, then we'll get rewarded. Barging in on Hermione won't make her happy." Harry pulled himself free and tore up the stairs until he heard Draco's voice. Pausing at the door, he tried to hear what Draco was saying but before he could distinguish anything the door swung open.

A girl, well a woman, was revealed. She reminded Harry greatly of Sirius' muggle posters. Her long hair was shiny and wavy, although slightly mussed. She was doing up the button on her rather revealing top. _Why have button on so little material?_ She looked him, her scarlet lips parting slightly. She was stunning, more than just beautiful, she was goddess like.

"Hello Harry," she said. He shook his head frowning. Something felt wrong.

"Hello," he said stupidly as a fog started to overwhelm his mind. He felt her take his wand, and jolted. "Give me back my wand."

"Why should I?"

"It's mine." He lunged for it, the haze starting to recede. She dodged him easily, and then smiled coyly.

"Draco? Could you please keep Harry here? I need to go back downstairs." The blonde boy pulled Harry into the room and closed the door. He could hear her voice through the wood. "Thank you Draco. When I get back there will be another reward for you if Harry is still in there." Draco licked his lips.

"Let me go Malfoy. She's using you."

"If she wants you here, you will stay here." As he spoke, he moved a chest of heavy drawers over the doorway with his wand and perched on top on them, eyes closed.

Harry moved to the far side of the room, cautious of Malfoy. He tapped his watch, muttering as Ginny's face appeared. She looked worried.

"Thank goodness you called Harry, I forgot how to use the watches and I can't find Hermione anywhere."

"I think we've got a bigger problem Gin."

-o-

**A/N: I really had fun writing this. Rebellion was especially amusing to write. Did you like it as much as I did?**

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